Bon Voyage to Ishaan

I never wrote
a letter to you!
Or i did, a few?
When you went away
Getting disgruntled
And bizarre
By our methods of parentage.
I still wonder
What would it be
If you remained away
But for providence
That came
Like a timely rescue
Giving both of us
The desired break.
But i think
I never wrote to you
There was nothing to make.

For god sake
Don't ever think
We're harsh to you
As we're equally harsh
On everything that came our way
May be, to see you
As what you ought to become
Though with no final shape
Like a runner
Practicing for a match run
Not for a trophy.
But i think
I never wrote to you.

I gave you sermons
Filled with parables
Which i never understood myself
Never did i follow any
Because i was a drifter
Like logs in a river, too many
I enjoyed you growing
In my lap
And in my surrounding
Never ever thinking
What will happen
Once you grow,
After all
Every bird flies
Swan or crow.
But i think
I never wrote to you.

When i pressed your back
Or treated an injury
Hope of happiness
Acted as an usurer
Piling up compound interest 
On the greed of loving ceaselessly
While I learnt
New words, language, images and taste
I wondered
What would i be without you, a waste.
But i think
I never wrote to you.

right since i called you

the Little Confucius

God gracious,

i have seen it all -

mischief, anger, deceit, perseverance,

melting eyes and toughened countenance,

your love for a single malt

and passion for relationship

swinging between

a common taste of Old Monk rum

to diverse ways of living

i have seen it all.

but i think 

i never wrote to you.

you fell, i got hurt

you cried, my peace dried

i laughed at all your glee

but never could see

that a rainbow 

is a seasonal phenomena.

we have harsh winters too

with buried hope of spring

like a dying patient

still breathing

for a miraculous recovery.

No, 

i should never write to you

it is better, a 'will' remains unread

for it makes, even love, 

a commercial transaction

feelings have no direction.